deflated.

So it's been a while since I've posted in this blog and I have really been meaning to lately because I am finally returning to Uganda on May 26th which is coming up quickly!! But I will write about that in a later post. Today's post is about something else.

I've been feeling a lot of anger and bitterness towards a lot of things lately and I feel like I need to somehow release it. Writing about it is definitely a start but I will definitely need to set aside some time to do something a bit more therapeutic. I'm currently at work on my break while I write this.

What am I angry about? To be honest I'm not quite sure. I think part of it is simply the fact that I work in a customer service position that takes a toll on my level of patience and compassion for others. It makes me hate being around people most of the time. Which is sad because I'm good at my job and I have some amazing customers but it's sooo testing at times. I have been witnessing a lot of negativity lately (and yes, I suppose you could say that my anger and frustration is negative as well) but i can't handle it. On the Internet,  in my work environment, and now my home life because I'm living with my family at home again. Being around so much negativity and trying to combat it is so completely deflating. I try to put positivity into the world and to bring about a different outlook and i just get exhausted by the lack of results. It's like I'm being beaten up by my inability to make change.

How this all relates to Africa is that it seems like the closer I get to my trip the more frustrating and stressful everything feels and the more annoyed by things I get. But on the other hand I can hardly wait to be back in that environment where I felt the exact opposite of everything I've just described. I'm so excited for a fresh culture and new faces and a different way of life that I once enjoyed so much. I need to get away from here so badly. I need a recharge. A boost of energy and an igniting of my passion. I definitely need to reconnect with myself and I'm hoping that will happen in Uganda.

I don't know if any of this post made sense but my break is about over and I just needed to get some thoughts out. Bye for now!