Fridays at a glance

When it rains in Uganda it rains HARD. And without warning. The day will start out so sunny that you assume it's gonna be a hot one, and then a couple hours later its thunder and lightening and rain. But to be honest I don't mind the rain (when I'm inside of course). I find comfort in it because it reminds me of home and the cooler temperature allows me to put a sweater on and feel cozy, and sometimes that's just nice to do. Even the loud pattering of the raindrops is a sound I find very soothing.

Luckily for us, today's rain didn't find us during the things we had to do this morning. On Friday we first go to Kalanamu Primary School to do our reading group with the P7 class. We are reading 'Underground to Canada' (really good story!) and the kids seem to be getting into it. After that we run a small clinic at our nursery school, treating malaria, flu, ringworm and removing jiggers. One kid today even had a tick attached to his eye - poor guy! I have yet to find the courage to remove jiggers as you have to use razors and needles to do so and it's quite uncomfortable for the child. Some of these kids sit like champs though. They are like 5 years old and not even flinching while we prod their little feet with needles. A jigger is a type of sand flea which burrows into the skin and can lay eggs and spread infection. I mainly just treat ringworm which is just by applying a cream. After 3 weeks I have seen a pretty impressive improvement in most of the kids so that's exciting.

Today we brought along our little assistant (Carli's youngest birth son, Zion) and I was showing him my camera on my iphone. He was fascinated by the view of himself on the screen and kept pointing at it and saying 'baby! auntie!' We took this cute pic:

Look at that face!

And here is one of Steven, a 6 year old boy who came to us at Carli's monthly sponsorship meeting who we were able to send to school for the first time. He is slightly disabled from having cerebral malaria at 3 years old but he sits well in class and his mother proudly walks him to and from school every day. 

Now we have some chai and wait for the rain to (hopefully) stop then off to pick the little ones up from school. Later on the library is open and we have invited some kids from the village who aren't attending to school to come for a couple of hours 3 times a week so we can read with them and give them some stimulation that they are missing out on by not going to school. As we can't sponsor every child, at least this gets them into a learning environment and some type of study time until they can eventually find the means to go to school. Today will be the first day so I'm curious to see how many kids turn up and what we can accomplish.

Corruption.

I've been asked many times if I could see myself one day moving to Uganda to live permanently. My answer is always 'probably not' and only for a few reasons, one which slapped me in the face last night. I should first admit that I would only ever choose to stay in Uganda permanently if I happened to meet someone special and we decided to build a life together here (which to be honest, at this point in my life seems too ridiculous to even type because I am far from ready for that). I know it wouldn't be hard to meet someone if I wanted to so badly, there are many men who would be ready to be my husband (not flattering myself, just being honest). But I just feel I have so much more I want to do and see before I settle anywhere. I'll never rule out the idea of living in Uganda completely because who knows what might happen in the future, but at this point I only see myself as a frequent visitor.

But anyways, back to the purpose of this post. The other major reason I couldn't live here is the government. The basic running of this country and the way things are and will likely remain for some time. The reason why soooo many children aren't going to school and why it is impossible to find a doctor in the local hospital, why families are hungry and children are dying in our village of malaria. These things are due to the so-called 'lack of resources' which is absolute BULLSHIT. It's the same thing how people say that they can't afford things yet they have $5 drinks at Starbucks every morning. It's not that they can't afford it or that there is a lack of resources, it's that their priorities are out of whack. I'm not judging the choices people make, I'm just saying that you can't make the claim that there's no money unless it's actually true. This point was proven 100% last night during a conversation with some 'government officials' of our area (that's what I will call them for the purpose of this post, however I would prefer to use some much less professional terms to describe them).

First of all, this government official is wearing a fancy suit and travelling with his expensive phone AND a tablet - it is very uncommon to see these things in the village. It's like he's trying to show off that he has money. We started talking about things that we hoped to see change in our area (we started by simply asking if it would be possible for the road to be fixed - it's nearly impossible to drive through some spots). This conversation developed into a very heated discussion about the things that are wrong with the government and the sub-county and everyone sharing their opinions on the subject. The government officials talked about the corruption that exists in the higher-up positions. Let me tell you, this man himself was the definition of corruption and everything that's wrong with this country (not to criticize the people of Uganda, just the way it is run). You know there's corruption when a government official flat-out admits that he drinks and drives - IN FRONT OF A TRAFFIC OFFICER I might add - and says 'but there's nothing anyone can do about it because I'm government!' I kept questioning why someone of government should be above the law and the only answer he could give me was 'because I'm government!' ...interesting... The traffic officer (who has become a friend of ours and was off-duty at the time) was arguing that she would pull him over anyways and his response was that she would lose her job if she tried. I was thoroughly annoyed and disgusted by the conversation already, but it continued. We tried to ask how it is fair that these people in government are so well-off while people in the village are dying. The government officials laughed in disbelief at the idea that people were dying in the bush. This is a very true fact.. Carli has attended several burials for CHILDREN in the past few months. They didn't seem to pay much attention to this and just said that there is no reason people should be dying as we have a hospital here.. yeah well just the other day Carli had to drive around the hospital compound for 10 minutes until she even found a nurse. No doctor was even on duty. It's so sad.

This is just a small example which perfectly illustrates the struggle I have between my love and compassion for Uganda and it's people, and the frustration I feel towards the lack of ability to make change and progress when the country holds itself back in so many ways. Also I must acknowledge that I understand corruption exists everywhere, but it's just a lot more evident here.

Anyways, I should wrap this up since I could write on and on about this subject and I'm sure it will come up again in the future. Just had to vent a little as life here can get so frustrating. Good days and bad days. It's all about the experience!

another roller coaster ride

I was reading some of my older posts that were written while I was in Uganda the first time (in 2012) and found that a lot of the things I was experiencing are happening yet again. It's not surprising I suppose but definitely interesting to reflect on.

A friend had written this quote in a comment on one of my posts:

"TRANSFORMATION - The process of exploring our inner landscape to find, awaken and integrate the aspects of ourselves that have been disconnected and separated from the whole."

I feel like this process happens many times throughout a person's life (if they choose to explore themselves in such a way for transformation to take place - I suppose some many never experience this on a large scale) and for me, this is another one of those times. Uganda will never fail to change me. Perhaps some of the surface level things that changed about me last time reverted back to how they were before, but for the most part I was seriously altered as a person. I can feel parts of myself being 'awakened' this time too.

I'm starting to think about other places I might want to travel and other types of work I might want to do. I'm currently reading a book (from Carli's library I might add) called 'The Hospital by the River' which is written by a doctor accounting her experience with her husband working in Ethiopia on fistula patients (google this now if you're not familiar - but be prepared). This book is making me seriously wish I had the stomach to handle the medical field because I know it would be sooo useful anywhere in the world and I could just spend my life travelling and working. But since that definitely is not a possibility for me as I can hardly stand getting my blood taken, I'm trying to explore other options. Social work is great and is always needed, but it doesn't always translate. Especially when there are language barriers - you end up relying on others to help you do most of the work.

The past few days I was feeling a bit helpless and idle, which is mostly just because I was trying to recover from having a flu so I did spend a lot of time resting. But I was also feeling like maybe I wasn't being useful enough or that maybe I wouldn't be able to accomplish what I thought I could. But today I didn't feel that way when I went to the local primary school to help teach a reading lesson to one of the classes. I started to feel inspired and motivated again. I'm planning to start another lesson with another class and may possibly do it on my own this time since I feel a bit more confident having done it a few times now. I started thinking that maybe it might be a smart idea for me to get certified in teaching English internationally and perhaps I could find work that way while fulfilling my travel needs.

I definitely want to continue on with my degree in Social Work, but I'm becoming more curious about other paths too. So many opportunities, so little time. And money. And I have to remember that if I don't focus in on something I will end up letting my energy go to a bunch of different things without many accomplishments to show for it. I need to rein it in somewhere or i'll drive myself mad. Anyways, I'll see what happens with the rest of this trip. Don't want to get too far ahead of myself. But at least in a couple years I can look back on this post and remember what this inspiration and transformation felt like, like I have done with my posts from two years ago. :)

i'm back

So I guess I should write a post here seeing as how I've been back in Uganda for 2 weeks! Time is flying yet at the same time it feels like I've been here for so long - almost like I never left.

I've had some technical issues with my computer which have prevented me from being as dedicated to this blog as I want to be but I have a moment to write now so I shall say a few words.

I don't even know what to say.. I could write several paragraphs already about what I've done in just two short weeks. But to be honest I don't really feel like doing that right now. I just feel like saying that I am so happy to be in Uganda. This trip has already exceeded any expectations I could have had. I feel like I'm at home. Things are different but it's the same loving family and the same comforting feeling of having a purpose and belonging to something.

I just feel content. Totally content. I'm never as collected and laid back at home as I am in Uganda. I never find myself overly stressed out about the little things when I'm here. It's just easy. Yet there are sooo many challenges and barriers and frustrations. But they don't disappoint me, they are motivating. There are so many possibilities here for different projects, it's amazing. I'm already thinking ahead to the next possible opportunity I might get to come back here. Uganda is definitely going to be part of my life for a long time - that I know for sure.